Tuesday, April 3, 2018

What I Learned during the Fourth Trimester

Until recently, I wasn't familiar with the term "fourth trimester",
and would probably have looked at you like you were crazy if you had asked me how that particular season was going!
It goes without mentioning that most of us are more than ready to be DONE with pregnancy by the end of the third trimester!
Since Tirzah arrived 5 weeks early, I skipped over part of that final stage!
But we all go through the next phase, whether or not the baby arrives early.
Typically, the fourth trimester is considered the 3 month time frame after the baby's birth.
I can hardly believe it, but we are just ending that phase as she celebrates 3 months earth-side today!
As I look back on these last 12 weeks, there are several things that I've learned - or maybe I should say "re-learned", since this is my third child!


1. Exhaustion is a real thing. Rest as often as possible!
I was so blessed with family and friends who offered to keep our two oldest children so I could sleep when the baby slept.
It was the best gift!


2. Vitamins are your best friend.
If you're one of those people who think vitamins are only for health nuts, hear me out! After giving birth, your body suddenly stops producing hormones that were necessary for the development of the baby. You are healing from said birth and producing nourishment for a tiny (albeit very hungry!) little human, all while being seriously depleted of sleep! A good prenatal vitamin is so important for you and your baby. Omega 3's are vital for brain health and aid in relaxation. I used a plant-based one that had Omegas 3, 6, 9, 5 and 7 in it! B12 is also wonderful in combatting those baby blues.


3. Accept help.
I think most of us have had great training in what it means to be a responsible adult, and that is such a good thing! But it can make it harder to admit that you do need help, and gracefully accept it when it is given. If a friend offers to come do your laundry and cook dinner, let her! And thank God if you have the gift of family close by, like I do! I had to swallow my pride when Tirzah was born, because I simply wasn't ready. The nursery wasn't even set up! But our family and friends stepped in and cleaned the house, including the refrigerator (which was an absolute disgrace!) and set up the nursery. My parents took down the Christmas decor and helped us get settled in. Friends brought delicious food. And I realized again what a beautiful gift community really is!


4. Remember that this is a phase.
My Mom has a simple piece of advice when I feel overwhelmed: "This too shall pass."
And she's right!
When  you wonder if you will ever get a full night's sleep again or the baby will ever move past their growth spurt and actually stay full longer than 1 hour, know that it will happen!


5. Trust your instincts.
Whether you're making a decision about sleep training, vaccinations or baby wearing, you will find there are as many opinions as there are people!
It can feel overwhelming, but as the mother of your child, you have a sense for what is best for your baby.
Every baby is different, and what works for another mama may not work for you...
and that is okay!


6. Enjoy your baby!
After having had 2 babies, I had an idea about how fast they really grow. But it still amazes me just how quickly they pass through each phase! Those precious newborn snuggles are THE BEST, and I cherish them even more because I know they don't last. I'm trying to savor the little grunts when she's eating, the way her chubby hand wraps around my finger and the softness of her cheeks.
I only get this chance once to enjoy her as a newborn,
and I'm soaking it up!